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The Career Disappointers

 

IV. THE ALTAR EGO

A man gets into a car. He puts the key in the ignition, but the car won’t start. “That’s strange”, he thinks to himself, “I put a fresh tank of holy water in only this morning.” Just then, a van drives by with the words CALL NOW emblazoned on its side. A sign! Closing his eyes, the man bows his head and prays: “O Infinite Cosmic Power, I gratefully accept Thy invitation and humbly call on Thee for a miracle. Please make this car move!” Nothing happens. After a few moments of mute perplexity, the man finally realises what is happening. “O Infinite Cosmic Power, I thank Thee for this message which Thou hast sent me from the Realms of Infinite and Pure Potentiality. I now realise it is Thy Will that I not drive this car. Thou wiltst miraculously get me to my destination some other way.” The man serenely gets out of the car, sits down on the pavement and waits. And waits.

 

 

DEFINITION: The Altar Ego is named after the tendency to take refuge in spirituality – or rather, in the sickly, unreal ‘spirituality’ promoted in so much New Age ‘Self-Help’ literature. The Altar Ego is typically a covert egotist whose devotion to the ‘Gospel Of Prosperity’ leads him or her to a crass equation of material success with godliness. The fact that said material success never seems to transpire for the Altar Ego-inspired individual prompts not puzzlement but a further round of mystification and gobbeldy-gook.

DISAPPOINTER MODE: using religion or spirituality as an opium to block out personal fears and failings, dressing up one’s ambitiousness in cod-spiritual garb.

MOTTO: ‘The Lord is my shepherd, I want, I want.’

APPOINTER MODE: sense of life’s mystery, existential leap of faith, appreciation that there may be more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in the practical world’s philosophy.

 

I.
THE FAULTER EGO
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II.
THE WALTER EGO
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III.
THE HALTER EGO
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IV.
THE ALTAR EGO
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V.
THE VAULTER EGO
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VI.
THE ALTERIOR EGO
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VII.
THE SALTER EGO
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VIII.
THE EXALTER EGO
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IX.
THE VOLTAIRE EGO
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